November 29, 2007

did you know...


YouTube.com was originally founded by God in 2001 as a forum for Holy members to showcase anti-Satan videos and Godly propaganda.It has also become a great way for people to waste their lives away in front of the Computer. However, God's sudden disappearance, coupled with the posting of footage of an archangel being hit square in the nuts with a football, led to a revolution in how the site was used. It is now only used by the demons of the underworld to rule and destroy all of mankind. The website was originally set up called "YourTube" intended to be a porn site. But they changed it when CNN gave them a monthly subscription to "Mm, big boobs" magazine.

YouTube was also founded as the #1 site where no-talent, no brain dumb broads working at StarBucks to actually go out on a limb and believe that in some small tiny manner the fact that they make stupid pointless videos which pc nerds unload a glob of cum on daily means that they will actually become famous or have a tiny bit of exposure one day. MySpace also works under this premise, but without videos. Sadly, they all end up either stuck right where they are or making horrible, horrible films with dismal reviews like "Hot Rod". If there was any justice on the face of this planet, all these nerdstar wannabes would be dragged out into the street and SHOT.

Don't you belive it? Check it here!

November 26, 2007

from the office...


----- Original Message -----
From: Padraig Murphy

To: AllMembers
Sent: Friday, November 23, 2007 02:39 PM
Subject: Lap top case gone missing

Hi There,


My laptop case has gone missing from my desk. It was empty except for a wireless internet connection, a memory stick, receipts and my passport. I'm hoping someone picked it up by accident or that I've been an idiot and left it at home (not entirely impossible).

There's a reward of a pint of guinness for the person who finds it!

Paddy
Industry Models & Assets
---


A couple of hours later...




----- Original Message -----
From: Padraig Murphy

To: AllMembers
Sent: Friday, November 23, 2007 04:53 PM
Subject: Bag found - Idiot status confirmed!


Hi There,

My bag was found - I'd rather not go into the details.

Cheers,

Paddy
Industry Models & Assets
---

November 07, 2007

from an internal note...


Hi all,

A sum of money has been found in Meeting Room 5 (the meeting room beside the Lagan Room)-please contact me if you believe it is yours-thanks

Thanks
Regards

Mary Mary & Mary
Administrator


Yeap.. this is NOT Brazil!

October 11, 2007

speed it up, babe...

speed it UP YOURS!

RTA – Speeding: No one thinks big of you







So, you think speed is cool, ain't ya? Right. But what you don't know is ONLY YOU might think that. Or ALL OF YOU, those who speed up all around! Get a life, before you lose yours... Ireland is getting famous about road accidents, and not all of them involve drunk drivers [Really??? How Surprise!!!], but simply speeding.

The government tries to discourage it with unpleasant advertising showing people dying in the roads, victims' sequelas and other consequences, but reality drives us to believe that NOTHING of these are working. The "serious" message is not getting there: those who speed up don't seem to care about serious messages... actualy, they [probably] don't get them. So... why not to change the approach?

The video above is a campaign in New South Gales, Australia, where the government decided to run by the sarcastic side of the road. After all, it's all about the size and strength of the penis, isn't it?


Washington Olivetto, a Brazilian advertising professional, tried to broadcast an advertise matching speed up with impotency, or sexual dysfunction. The idea was, as the guys cannot attend sexualy, they speed up the gaspedal. In other words, THEY GAS [show off]! It didn't work too much, because moralists didn't like the message and censored it - did they see themselves there?


Trânsito com Segurança [1975, in Portuguese]

September 13, 2007

get rid of them: telemarketers


When getting calls from telemarketers, don't lose your time asking them their names. They probably are Johns or Davids and Marys or Janes, it just depends on which section they sit.

To get rid of them, you have two possible answers: Or you say straight "I'm sorry I'm not interested" and hang up the phone, or, if you don't want to be so rude, you can always say "I'm quite busy right now, but if you give me your home number I call you back at dinner time."

September 11, 2007

The day God didn't bless America


an ode over God Bless America

While the missiles gather far across the world, far there in Afghanistan, allow, God, the american to damn the land that once was free, let them all be homesick for a land once fair, as they raise their voices in a solemn moan.

Why didn't Thou God bless America with Thine immeasurable love? Why didn't Thou stand beside her and guided her through the night with the light from above skies? From the mountains to the prairies? And to the ocean white with foam?

What the God? What the Head? Allah drove the planes to the towers, instead. Are they the same God? Are they driving the same squad towards the same plod? Why didn't Thou God bless America, the home sweet home of americans, now anti-broths of men.

August 29, 2007

A Friend's Farewell


We brazilians grown up listening to the nationalist propagandas, mainly during the military ages, like "this is a prosperous country!", "Brazil is the country of the future!", or things mixed up with soccer's passion, like "All together now, go ahead Brazil! Brazil!"

Even you are patriot, you cannot just turn your back to the fact Brazil is one of the most socially unjust countries - apart some undeveloped ones. For instance, just came up in a survey carried on in Brazil stating that the 10 richiest families consume more than the 40% of the poorest ones. In other words and some numbers, only 10 families spend more than R$1,800 monthly whilst 40% of the poorest ones barely spend R$180.

This is Brazil, and these kind of things are the ones which bring up all the violence, mainly but not only, among the poor people. We can blame the military period, but the civilian era had time enough to do something about this. The more integrated people say "The country is finding its way", but the apocalyptics say it will take decades to get there... Eventually, it's all a matter of education, formal and informal... but this is another story. What I want to say is that, at least, one of the military propaganda had results on lots of people:
Brazil: Love it or leave it!
And from the green island of Eire, as you can see, where the earth is so light, the wind so breezy and the rain so f**king insistent, I can say that this was a GREEN thing, that gave me the strength to carry on this self-banishment, and create the opportunity to open my mind to other perceptions and to meet such wonderful people.

About Yesterday:
A friend of mine returned to Brazil, for personal reasons. He believes life will be better there. As we are used to say, "May the earth be light on you", meaning the wish that everything goes nice and easy.

I'm sure he will do good and will have all the best. Looking forward to see him again... and soon, I would say "good luck", but as artists, actors and hoofers, maybe is better to say, "break a leg"!

And I could not loose the opportunity of an Irish Blessing, could I?
May the road rise to meet you,
May the wind be always at your back,
May the sun shine warm upon your face,
The rains fall soft upon your fields and,
Until we meet again,
May God hold you in the palm of His hand.
And for those who stay:
May your glass be ever full.
May the roof over your head be always strong.
And may you be in heaven half an hour before the devil knows you're dead.
Sláinte!

August 09, 2007

bush, bush

You see, not only did the attacks help accelerate a recession, the attacks reminded us that we are at war.
--George w. Bush

Washington, DC
06/08/2005

July 26, 2007

The amateur's world

This is a book: The Cult Of The Amateur, by Andrew Keen.

Who is Andrew Keen?

(From Andrew Keen's blog) Born circa 1960, he is a British-American entrepreneur and author best known as a critic of Web 2.0. In the mid Nineties, he was a member of the pioneering generation of Silicon Valley visionaries who first “got” the Internet. He founded Audiocafe.com in 1995, and, securing significant investment from Intel and SAP, established it as one of the most highly trafficked websites of the late Nineties. As the Chief Executive of Audiocafe.com, Andrew became a Silicon Valley celebrity.n 2000, Andrew produced “MB5: The Festival for New Media Visionaries,” a futurist show featuring some of Silicon Valley’s leading pundits. Andrew’s erudition, his entrepreneurial experience, and his writing and public speaking skills have established his voice today as both the most controversial and incisive in Silicon Valley.

Is He a Semi-Ludd?

The Luddites were member of organized groups of early 19th-century English craftsmen who surreptitiously destroyed the textile machinery that was replacing them, during the Industrial Revolution. The movement began in Nottingham in 1811 and spread to other areas in 1812. The Luddites, or “Ludds,” were named after a probably mythical leader, Ned Ludd. They operated at night and often enjoyed local support. Harsh repressive measures by the government included a mass trial at York in 1813 that resulted in many hangings and banishments. The term Luddite was later used to describe anyone opposed to technological change.

Knee says that the democratized media is a ill. Self-made music (not Bob Dylan or Bach), self-made books (not Dante or Borges), self-made videos (not Bergman or Hitchcock) and self-made news (not necessary real), self-made intellectual material (not Adorno, Spinoza, Nietzsche...). A cacophony, in his words. A mix of Wikipedia, MySpace and YouTube. A world of amateurs desperately trying to express themselves. Better, desperately trying to >i>show themselves, because there's nothing wrong in express yourself, in their proper dimension and extension.

In other words, nobody should read/listen/watch to the internet material without a huge dosis of criteria, because democratization also means banalisation.

July 18, 2007

Homo sapiens, deus quod propago

(human beings, god and propaganda)

"Quo iure? Quo animo?"
(By what law? With what spirit?)

Listening to John Coltrane - The Night Has A Thousand Eyes - I started to wonder about the human beings and their dogmas.

Today is the 25th aniversary of the Mein Kampf - Adolph Hitler's masterpiece. I immediately thought about Nietzsche.

Despite the fact that Hitler's book was all based on Nietzsche's philosophy, it gives us a good example on how distortion of a such original, exceptional and radical thought (nietzscheian), could drive things to an opposite direction (hitlerism).

The clever use of quotations extracted from the context are frequently used as a good way of directing the spirits. Hitler knew how to use words of wisdom (?) to persuade people - from a farmer to an intellectual, althought the intellectuals were far harder to convince, as he had to level his speech to the lowest ones, as he taught in the Mein Kampf, through this maxim:
"All propaganda must be popular and its intellectual level must be adjusted to the most limited intelligence among those it is addressed to. Consequently, the greater the mass it is intended to reach, the lower its purely intellectual level will have to be."

While Nietzsche's Superman is heroic, a being totaly free from the Christian dogmas whom preach the mercy, the humility, and the socratic-alexandrine principles of the occidental culture's decay, Hitler's Superman is cruel and oppressing, enslaved of the propagandistic alienation, as he is in constant guilt and auto-persecution.

For those whom say to make things on behalf of the democracy, aiming specially - or only - economic interests, through bloody wars that cause the destruction of countries and the death of millions of human beings in the world.

And to finalise - I want to quote too, or the rude ones also quote! But if you excuse me, I'll do it in Latin...

Quot homines, tot sententiae
(As many men, so as many opinions)

As you can see, it is easy to quote. Hard is to be authentic...

June 20, 2007

Extra! Extra! Pop-Culture Can Melt Brain Cells!

Researchers are using specialized imaging techniques to study the cultural processes involved in brain cell death. Here, astrocytes – the most abundant brain cell type – have been treated in-vitro with a chemical that mimics the in-vivo effect of a "pop-culture overdoses". After six days of exposition to pop-books, pop-music and pop-painting, the impact on the astrocytes was assessed using a technique called fluorescence immuno-reactivity. This microscope image clearly shows that the astrocytes are producing damage-related proteins, the green and red areas. Once the cells were re-implanted into the recipient's brain, they'd demonstrated a huge, rambunctious and boisterous desire for "quotations".

“Every man's memory is his private literature.”
A.H.

June 10, 2007

slowing down global warming

Bush and Putin have met each other in Europe last week, during the G8 summit. Tensions all around, the main issue was, undoubtedly, the USA anti-missiles bases in Poland an Czech Republic.

What seemed to be a good opportunity to Bush act as a good guy, turned around in an astonishing Putin's checkmate on Bush position. Russian premier minister Vladimir Putin - far from be considered a good guy either - played one of the most strategical politic maneuver in international relationships in the last years.

Following their compatriots Kasparov and Karpov, Putin offered Bush a joint missile shield in Azerbaijan, causing all USA allies to reassess the position of their pieces in the world's board.

The once bad guy seems to be not too bad now. Good for everybody, although the skeptics are saying that a new Cold War would be their way of slowing down Global Warming...

June 07, 2007

global warming and g-eight

A climate change standoff between Germany and the US hangs over the opening session of this year's Group of Eight (G8) summit in Germany this morning.

Seven world leaders touched down in Rostock yesterday afternoon, over 10,000 protesters succeeded in blocking access by road to the Baltic coast resort of Heiligendamm and forced organisers to bring in delegates by sea and air. This is this year's Group of Eight (G8) summit in Germany... and the main (and uncomfortable) talk should be about climate change.

The US president said he came with a "strong desire to work on a post-Kyoto Agreement" - the same one which Washington refuses to ratify.

Mr. Blair called for a "new global deal that involves all the main players including America and China" based on "a global target for a substantial reduction in greenhouse gas emissions".

U2 front man Bono has complained of having a "huge row" with German officials and is "sceptical" about G8 leaders. He is interested in Africa - the deployment of a joint UN-African Union force in the region has been delayed by leadership rows.

As always, seems that Mother Earth is the one in the row...